What Would You March For?
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Dateline Hong Kong August 18, 2019 Protestor March 5:03 PM I am standing in front of a mall in the middle of Hong Kong as thousands of
Therapists’ Blog
Welcome to our Therapists’ Blog, where we post insights and innovative techniques for couples therapists. Just scan and click to read the articles below, choose by category on the bottom right, or use the search box above. You can also sign up to receive these by email by providing your name and email address in the box at the bottom of the page.
Using Initiator-Inquirer to Support Growth in Couples
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One of the reasons I find the Initiator-Inquirer process especially valuable in our work with couples is that it exposes so much about where they are developmentally.
Getting Started with an Enmeshed Couple Moving to Early Differentiation
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Couples who marry young often establish enmeshed relationships that inhibit individual growth. They have not had the opportunity to mature and do much differentiation work prior to
Working with Partners Who Aren’t Equally Committed to Their Relationship
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In a recent blog post I outlined some of the ways I work with couples who are caught in patterns of externalization and blame in their relationships.
Intimacy Avoidance Comes with Externalization and Blame
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In spring of 2018 I wrote a blog post about the cycle of externalization and blame. This dynamic is a familiar one for couples therapists because so
A Powerful Exercise to Promote the Work of Differentiation in Couples
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The differentiation stage is, by far, the most difficult for many couples. Helping each partner set self-focused autonomous goals is crucial to their growth as individuals and
The Couples Conference 2019
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This year’s Couples Conference explored 5 major models of couples therapy. These included PACT, Gottman, EFT, Relational Life and the Developmental Model. I had the honor of
Helping couples realize it takes two to manage long-standing pain
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Anxiety, anger, and jealousy are emotions I see often in many of the couples I have worked with over the years, and I’m sure it’s no different
Working with The Brilliant Skeptic or Paranoid Adaptation
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A while ago I was thinking about specific challenges that can come up in our work with couples – ones that may require us to go “off
6 Personality Adaptations and 3 Doors: a model for knowing where to connect with your clients
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What can we do when partners show resistance to our interventions? This is a question that came up recently in my online training group, when a therapist
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