Intrapsychic Impasses10 Skills for Early Sessions
Each year I mentor a small group of therapists to help them set goals for their business and clinical skills. I often ask them to assess themselves by being brutally honest about their ability on a variety of criteria that I believe make for strength and effectiveness as a couples therapist. I am including some of these here so you too can assess yourself.
Couples Therapist Self-Assessment
First, read the following statements and respond with a simple yes or no. Later, come back and use a 1-7 on a continuum from very strong to very weak.
Early Sessions with Couples:
__ I have a plan when I talk to potential clients on the telephone.… Read more...
Losing Momentum: Do You Start Strong and Then See the Energy Fizzle?![]() Creating Intrapsychic Change in Self-Absorbed Partners![]() Intrapsychic Impasses with Self-Absorbed Partners![]() The Self-Absorbed Partner, Video Two![]() The Self-Absorbed Partner, Video One![]() Building Effective Collaboration with a Highly Anxious Client![]() Confronting Negative Beliefs and Projections
In December, I set a daunting task for myself. I volunteered to do a clinical demonstration at the Brief Therapy conference. I have done many demos over the years, but the topic for this one was about confronting negative beliefs and unrelenting projections in couples relationships.
Why is this so challenging in a role play demonstration? When we see clients in our practice, their negative projections have had years to grow and take root. At the conference, I planned to do a role play demonstration with two people who just met and would try to recreate the dynamics of a long-term very intractable negative projection.… Read more...
Identify Two Common Inhibitors to Progress in Couples Therapy
This month, we thought we'd address the problem of being “lost and wandering” in the middle stage of couples therapy. This can be tough because the couple may not tell you directly. You may not want to admit it to yourself. Or, if you admit it, it may take you time to figure out how to get back on track.
Here are some ideas to simplify the process of regrouping.
If you are “lost and wandering,” it is often the result of one of the following two problems.
I. GOAL DIFFICULTY: You have lost track of the original goal, or the partners have become vague and ill-defined about their own goals.… Read more...
Transactional Analysis: Strategies
Strategies for Working With Lies, Passive-Aggressive Behavior and Affairs
Ellyn Bader, Ph.D., is Co-Founder & Director of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, California. She is long-time members of the International Transactional Analysis Association (ITAA) and have served in various capacities in the organization. Ellyn was president of the ITAA from 1984-1985. This is an interview of Pete and Ellyn conducted by Bill Cornell for ITAA's publication The Script.
Bill: I'm glad to have the chance to talk with both of you, especially since the stimulus for this interview is the release of your new training tape for the ITAA “Transactional Analysis in Action” series.… Read more...
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