Do Your Couples Get High From Cheating?
I heard an interesting interview a few weeks ago as I was driving to work. Michael Smerconish was interviewing Celia Moore from the London Business School about research on cheating. While it is almost universally accepted that people who lie, cheat or steal feel guilty (if they are not sociopaths) unexpectedly her team discovered a […]
An Unexpected Opening for Confronting Hypocrisy
“Compassion is a lifetime business. You can’t say something like, ‘I will have compassion on Monday, Thursdays and Fridays only. But for the rest, I will be cruel’. That is hypocrisy.” – Israelmore Ayivor Today we’re examining a session with a volatile couple that quickly escalate and change topics. They don’t listen well to each […]
Ellyn interviews a group member who was skeptical about online training
Ellyn: Hi Barbara. Thank you for speaking with me today. I have a feeling there are lots of people who feel as resistant as you did about an online training program. I think it would be really helpful for them if I could ask you a few questions about your experience. First can you say […]
Hypocrisy, Immorality, Shame and Change
“It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.” ― Noël Coward, Blithe Spirit Today I’d like to share a fascinating piece on hypocrisy from the University of Colorado’s Conflict Research Consortium. They studied how to use confrontation of hypocrisy on a large scale to bring about social […]
Issues that Underlie Hypocritical Binds
Earlier this summer I started a blog series about hypocrisy in couples therapy. I was pleased to see so many of you respond on the blog sharing your own examples of these vexing moments and hypocritical binds in your practice. I promised some follow-up. So here it is, including a video I prepared on the […]
Issues that Underlie Hypocritical Binds
Earlier this summer I started a blog series about hypocrisy in couples therapy. I was pleased to see so many of you respond on the blog sharing your own examples of these vexing moments and examples of hypocritical binds from your practice. I promised some follow-up. So here it is. Many of the partners we […]
Couples Conference Notes for You
I am stuck in the LA airport counting the hours until I can get home and sleep in my own bed. Indefinite delays at the boarding gate are particularly difficult after the hard work and excitement of the Couples Conference. After sitting here for 3 hours, I realize I can pass the time more productively […]
Felony Lies
At the end of last month’s post, I asked you to think about a couple’s unfolding history and share how you would structure treatment after disclosure of an affair and a history of lies and deceit. What might you say to them at the end of the first session? And what would be some considerations […]
Lies to the Self, Lies to the Partner and Lies to the Therapist
When working with a couple in the aftermath of infidelity, how do you approach lies and a history of deception? When is a lie “just a little white lie” and when is it much more serious? Is it a common pattern of deception, does it represent a developmental issue, or is it a character issue? […]
Two Experts’ Insights for Dealing with Infidelity
Here you’ll find Infidelity Conference summaries from Alex Katehakis and Tammy Nelson, focusing on sexuality and eroticism.
We respect your privacy,