interview

Pete’s Interview – Stages of Relationships – Triggers

Thanks for your interest in my recent interview on NPR. I hope you get some valuable insights for your relationship regarding: The stages of a relationship or marriage Lies we tell our partners Triggers we have that cause challenges in our relationships You won't want to miss my impromptu session with a stranger where I walked a listener through a long time trigger that he had interacting with his partner. In less than ten minutes, he was able to begin feeling differently and break a pattern he has had for years (Listener Question 2 at about 36 minutes in). Your browser does not support the audio element. Podcast Highlights: 01:05 – Honeymoon Stage and Innocent Lies in the Beginning 05:40 – Avoiding the Truth 10:00 – Start to Work as a TEAM 10:45 – Partners on a Pedestal at the Beginning 11:30 – Tell Me No Lies 11:45 – Second Stage – Power Struggles 15:50 – Marriage is the only Non-Hierarchical Relationship there is.… Read more...

10 Skills for Early Sessions

Each year I mentor a small group of therapists to help them set goals for their business and clinical skills. I often ask them to assess themselves by being brutally honest about their ability on a variety of criteria that I believe make for strength and effectiveness as a couples therapist. I am including some of these here so you too can assess yourself. Couples Therapist Self­-Assessment First, read the following statements and respond with a simple yes or no. Later, come back and use a 1­-7 on a continuum from very strong to very weak. Early Sessions with Couples: __ I have a plan when I talk to potential clients on the telephone.… Read more...

Ellyn interviews a group member who was skeptical about online training

Ellyn:  Hi Barbara. Thank you for speaking with me today. I have a feeling there are lots of people who feel as resistant as you did about an online training program. I think it would be really helpful for them if I could ask you a few questions about your experience. First can you say a little bit about why you thought it wouldn’t work for you? Barbara:  I’m part of a generation before the computer, so online learning is not in my comfort zone. I thought I’d feel detached from the teacher. And without being there in person, I just didn’t think it would be effective for me. Ellyn:  I certainly understand that because I’m of that same generation.… Read more...

Interview with Ellyn Bader

by Richard Landis, Ph.D. This article was originally published in the Spring 2004 issue of The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter. Dr. Ellyn Bader is Co-Founder & Director of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, CA. They are often considered to be among the leading experts in couples' therapy training the world today. Dr. Bader spent eight years on the clinical faculty in the Department of Psychiatry at Stanford University School of Medicine. She and her husband are the authors of the classic “In Quest of the Mythical Mate: A Developmental Approach to Diagnosis and Treatment in Couples Therapy,” and most recently, “Tell Me No Lies.” While she was preparing for this spring's conference, “Challenging Couples, Challenging Therapists,” I spoke with Dr.… Read more...
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