anger

First of Four-Part Series: Challenges of Hostile Angry Couples

Young Couple Having Argument At HomeI consult on so many cases where therapists are struggling to be effective leaders with hostile angry couples, I know it is a widespread problem. The more disorganized a couple is and the more hostility there is, the more difficult it’s going to be for you to structure sessions and arrive at effective goals for each session.… Read more...

Painful Interactions Are Defining Moments in Couples Therapy

angry outburst_225Sooner or later you will encounter a situation where one partner is aggressively triggered in your office. They explode after hearing an unexpected comment. At that point they are flooded with emotion and become explosively furious. They often just want to “express their rage” and they definitely don’t want to be interrupted.… Read more...

Self-Reflection in Chronically Angry Couples

  This month I’m writing about the chronically angry couple. These couples often wait too long to go to therapy or may have tried therapy with a therapist who did not provide enough structure for them. At the beginning, these couples need structure and they need for the therapist to be especially clear about the direction of their work. Chronically angry couples have several traits in common: 1. Frequent, rapid escalation of hostility (either overtly or passive-aggressively) 2. High demand for intimacy without the developmental capacity to support the demand 3. Minimal self responsibility paired with an avoidance of vulnerability 4.… Read more...
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