Emotionally Focused Therapy

Reflections on Attachment and Differentiation

At this year's Couples Conference in Boston, I participated in a panel discussion with Sue Johnson, one of the founders of Emotionally Focused Therapy, or EFT, on the role of attachment and differentiation-based interventions in couples therapy. This month I wanted to share with you some of my remarks and reflections on the outcome of that discussion. Opening: I wanted to do this panel with Sue because she has spent much of her career focusing on facilitating secure attachment in couples' relationships, and I have spent years teaching and describing differentiation. I believe that in humans a dialectic tension exists between the desire for connection/closeness and the push towards individual development and self fulfillment.… Read more...

The Science-Art-Research Controversy and Your Practice

  Many of you know that Pete and I have devoted our careers to continually searching for more effective ways to help couples develop loving relationships. We challenge partners to move beyond their ineffective coping strategies, to manage their emotional reactivity, and to pursue the dreams that brought them together. We also facilitate couples in navigating the balance between closeness/attachment and effective differentiation. We’ve chosen to work in the trenches teaching classes, presenting workshops, leading couples groups and doing ongoing therapy. Over the years we’ve learned a lot first-hand about what works and what doesn’t work to bring about change!… Read more...
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