Couples’ Fights: What Is One Big Common Denominator?

Couples fight for many reasons. Yet, at the heart of most fights are violated expectations. There is a significant difference between expectations and desires and it is this difference that causes much painful struggling in couples relationships. Expectations have a “should” quality implied about them. For example, “My partner should do X. It’s just the right thing to do. Therefore I have permission to be passive without putting much effort into helping bring those expectations into being.” However, when someone really desires something and especially if they want it quite fiercely, they will activate themselves to obtain it.… Read more...