2-chair work

Losing Momentum: With Passive-Aggressive Partners and their Spouses

Momentum-imageMany therapists dread working with couples where one partner is extremely passive or passive-aggressive. Passive-aggressive partners create a lot of confusion. Commitments are regularly broken, and criticism and passivity dominate the couple’s interactions. Their spouse is usually enormously frustrated and angry. Any attempts by the couple to change the pattern fail, and increasingly the interpersonal dynamics between these partners zap the life right out of the relationship – until the life force is gone. In fact, once a couple has interacted like this for years, they aren’t very likely to unravel the pattern themselves.… Read more...

Losing Momentum: Do You Start Strong and Then See the Energy Fizzle?

Momentum-imageIt’s pretty common to start couples therapy strong. You use your empathy skills and make a good connection with each partner. Each one has a chance to describe the problem and each feels understood. And with basic skills, you begin to shift troubled interactions to more collaboration and better communication. Then it happens. Progress stalls. Sessions start feeling repetitive. Your insights and feedback have limited value.… Read more...
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