“Above and Beyond the Call of Duty” (“ABCD”) cards are something that you can give to your clients to get better results with them. You give ABCD cards to couples who are learning a new behavior and forgetting to practice it at home. They’re so stuck in their old patterns that they need something really clever and different to help them remember it.

Couples take a few cards home with them. Then, when one person notices that the other gets a new behavior right, they give their partner a card. It helps them three ways: first a partner has to remember to do the new behavior; then the other partner has to notice; and finally, that partner takes the time to acknowledge the behavior with a card. It’s simple but ingenious.

“ABCD” cards are the size of a business card. They’re a token of appreciation that one partner gives to another to acknowledge something the person did. There are four different designs. And the fifth card in the deck, “Get out of jail free” is everybody’s favorite. It’s a perfect way to practice forgiveness and keep things friendly when someone slips up.


Note: “ABCD” cards are no longer available for purchase. They are available only by special arrangement.